Kayczee's blog: "My Poetry"

A Fool In Love Have you ever been afraid of feeling more than you should? Or more than you believed or conceived that you could... It's the little things in life that help you touch the sky Living moment to moment... too many loves gone by The past built a sea around me of "could have been" sorrows Filled with empty "I love you"s and "I'll call you tomorrow"s Then the sound of solitude becomes a cry for help... have been a hermit crab too many times in my life!!! My heart is hopeful that THIS time, it's all true and THIS time it will be beautiful, gentle, and smooth and THIS time I've found my best friend, my soul mate and lover. So please, ...come to me in silence and when the time comes for us to be in the eye of a storm... Lay with me in a whisper, and listen to the warmth There has never been a smile in my memory that came as easily, nor was as meant from my heart and soul ... as this one ... as when you're with me in peacefulness ... Serenity ...No fights, no arguments just laying together and cuddling in soft spoken words feeling your body... your skin against mine that's what's most precious to me and special in my mind. I get caught in the quiet, trying to forget it all And each moment I look into his eyes, there is a new burst, a power so strong, that I feel like it hurts... maybe destroy me completely. Jumping into the ocean of love ...remember the rainbow??? ~ the waves threaten to swallow and take me under. Deep into darkness and going UNDER! Yet I take the chance and let my wall down but then... then it happened again! The real world has crushed my dream with all the influence of life crashing in... Now these moments are few and far between and once again there's light... I find myself in a tunnel, dark and gloomy with no end in sight I'm left longing for the perfect moment in my heart and mind. All I can do is hang in there,hope and pray, telling my heart to be strong and get stronger every day! So I won't feel it crushing this time and take a risk at becoming a stranger to the love of my life for he is 'lost' already in heart, soul and mind... His journey will be a long and exhausting one as I am left wishing I could help him more than this especially help understand how I can not cope with the worries and stress, always wondering... my loving heart at attention, keen on signs and emotions ... rather be numb at times or hating him ~ so much easier it would be and hurt so much less! But than that wouldn't be me now would it? ... loving him so, with adoration and with all my heart & soul! So I pray for him and ask for forgiveness for I couldn't be strong... or stronger than I am. Pray for understanding of my condition, to see that I'm wasting away into nothingness it seems and just can't stand as close as I would love to be. Pray for the strength and the guidance that is needed to make it through this test of Life and for our Love. And most of all, I pray for the chance to make my love see the true path bestowed upon us as ONE... Because do I love you... my partner, my lover, my best friend July 24th, 2008

My dreams are hauntingly hovering over me wishing for you to come to my door I try to leave my doors open yet I'm looking for all the signs feelings of despair are a threat to me now tell me, are you sincere and true? See, I wear my heart on my sleeve you know though my love is always up for grabs I don't trust much in a man no more for my heart is still broken... trying to put my puzzle back in place are you my missing piece? I get swept away in emotion, passion even wishing for all to be right and real the way it is supposed to be... trust, respect and faithfulness adore someone and cherish too! As much as I dream, as much as I wish I've heard it all before! I adore you, I love you, I want to be there beside you you are all I've ever wanted you are the one for me my dear well, how do I know?? Until I can feel you within my soul look into your eyes watch for all the signs and know you're soul is pure until you love me with all your heart I can only hope for sure! Swept away for now trying to hold on the current is getting stronger and it scares me all to hell looking for a branch to grasp as the stream carries me away Only one true to his own heart pure a soul as can be shall grasp my hand and hold it dear be careful because I do bite for noone shall fool me ever again I can't afford another fake heart

Trust I had it all I gave everything ~ my heart and soul It felt oh so true and real Only to fall to pieces With my soul left to bleed I had it all Trust in my man Respect for him I gave everything My all, my everything Only to fall to pieces With my soul left to bleed I had it all Or so I thought My trust deceived My love tarnished I gave him my heart to cherish Only to fall to pieces With my soul left to bleed Now all Trust is broken My Faith has failed me Loneliness sets in once again I ask you now… How can I Trust? How can my Faith in Love be restored? When it felt so true and real… So honest and sincere?

I had a dream last night it was powerful and full of emotion colorful passion and deep desires it was like being swallowed up whole in love left feeling wanting more, in need of you I never ever dreamed like this before not that I can remember... I woke from this dream still feeling you still having desires rush through my body at the same time giving in to what it was Part of me was overwhealmed yet I felt complete and fullfilled Is it strange to feel this way? I was alone and left yearning for you... more so a need to be next to you Not just now or only tomorrow but always ... each and every day So I ask you, my love may I lay beside you at night... to wake with you each morning? I love you baby!

People In Your Life Some come and go few come and stay even fewer touch your heart and soul and even those at times disappear like they blow up in smoke they tear at your heart and even threaten to destroy your soul Going under again... trying to hold on ~ falling deeper and deeper into a black hole grasping at anything anything at all and when you think wou've failed... Then one of those few that come and stay grab you by your hand to hold on tight save what's left of your heart and your soul save what's left of what's dear to them Please hold on to me now for I need a good rock to steady me now for my heart needs to sing my soul needs to smile I need you my friend so hold on tight

It's like standing at the top of a waterfall streams of emotions rushing by your feet draining from your heart as to prevent from drowning in a pool The currents are strong the force is greater than I ever imagined at times overwhelming yet calming my soul Knowing these emotions are true and genuine never having felt like this before knowing my very soul bears the cause of this it has finally found a connection Feelings in all colors of the rainbow beautiful... amazing... pleasing... making me want to leap into the pool of water below Only to feel the passion running through me to experience and explore all there is each wave, each current, and every flow to feel complete within my heart and to please my soul with you close to me So baby won't you please take my hand Stay beside me ... take that leap along with me I know it can't be wrong I know we can be strong I know within my heart that it's right and my soul is telling me so

I look at you getting lost in your eyes watching your smile craving your touch wanting to kiss all seems but a dream I think of you we walk together hand in hand roam the park arm in arm all seems but a dream yet you are with me Baby I'm falling falling for you ~ so true my soul seeking yours fall more each day my heart is yours as I dream of you and know you are my dream come true

Thoughts of you enter my mind Wanting to whisper in your ear sweet somethings are to mend that emptiness my friend Thoughts of you make me smile Wanting happiness within your heart Breaking loneliness apart to let the warmth & love spread within Let me take your hand & hold it dear I want you safe you hear!

Twisted I've waited for what seemed forever to talk to you Tears ran down my face I was sad and happy all at once when you finally came to me you have me all twisted up inside I could tell you still care I would have seen it in your eyes if I could have looked at your face I know how you felt and know what you mean and I understood all too well you have me all twisted up inside We couldn't spend all the time in the world our lives being so far apart... there was so much more I wanted to say to you so much more I had to share with you but there wasn't time and I felt maybe even the wrong time you have me all twisted up inside All I know is this I need you to take a leap with me I need you to just take a chance I need you to try to understand and hope what you've said is true and most of all I need to know what's within your heart for me today you have me all twisted up inside I know within my soul I love you I know that all I want is you and the only one I will ever love is you the way I truely love you now cause every time you look at me you touch my very soul every time you smile at me my heart melts all over again you have me all twisted up inside

I can't even imagine loving anyone more than you Yes, we are separate people, sometimes with different ways of thinking or doing things, but maybe that's why we're such a good match. I can't imagine wanting to share a secret, a little dream, or a silly laugh with anyone as much as I do with you. Your love is home for my heart. I admire your commitment to what you believe is right, respect your willingness to work hard, appreciate your strength and kindness, and love the fun we have together... in public and private! When you flash your smile and give me "that look", my heart melts all over again. I could never imagine anyone I'm prouder to walk beside, feel closer to, or love as deeply as I love You... now and forever. *Ginnie Job