the blazen minx's blog: "Something I wrote...be kind"

You long throughout your life For something you hold so dear To find that special someone You want to love for all of time To feel the heat of that one persons skin – As you lay nestled close to him To hear the baritone deepness of his voice – As he whispers to you in the night You feel safe and warm Laying in his arms Hoping one day he will come That perfect one that you will love Just wait and see for he will come The lover of your dreams

A growing desire builds upon Unbreakable trust that holds her To him, that feeds her love A single look from him Causes her to tremble in anticipation For a simple touch Her body yearns with Undisguised passion An animalistic kind of need That only he is able to fulfill A strengthening feeling overwhelms And consumes her To a point where she shakes with Unquenchable desire He knows her needs, her wants And he knows how to give it to her She trusts him implicitly Knows that he won’t hurt her to be cruel.

Caught adrift on a wave of blissful immortality Immune from the pain of death Still feeling emotional train wreck Of love and loss, and in between Stuck in the eternal rut of repeating The same mental state of the decisions past made Trying to hide from the internal demons Stabbing at my soul leaving ragged gashes That never do heal, only rip open more They never leave, and are never silent Close my eyes to block out the world And they are there waiting to tear into me more Leaving my crying out in hysteria Begging them to let me be Detach myself from my body To be alone in my mind Where I can’t be harmed But I can’t be loved Because they don’t understand The hurt that I feel, they never will Destined to be alone for all of time Until I find one that will understand One that will deny these demons access To the torn and tattered soul that dwells inside One that will protect me from pain And love me for the one that I am But is there truly one, who can do that, Who can love me unconditionally despite my faults? So alone I stay trying to dodge the demons Until He finds me.

A tear falls from glassy blue orbs A strong but tender hand reaches out To wipe away the tear Loving and soft, a gentle touch Helping to ease the pain That is felt deep within A journey taken, long and perilous Curving and winding, dipping and rising Never straight, never easy A tendency to fall from the right behavior shows A stern voice calls out To teach and guide Caring yet hard, a model to follow Molding into what is meant to be Keeping the discipline strict, So that the mind grows And the heart loves with unrelenting loyalty.

An uncertainty lingers in the heart and soul Afraid to choose wrong Scared to speak up and be cast down For opinions and thoughts and feelings Unsure of how to say something Without the other party taking it wrong And feeling hurt by what was said But how do I say what I need to say And how do I move on When there are some trying to control me In a way that I can’t abide by But how can I let them know That I need my space That yes I do need help But I can’t let them take over my life I need to be able to take my life And fix it, get to where I need to be Without the bad influences I want help yes but I also want to do it mostly on my own.